Naturally
When I discover the cleverness of a remarkable me,
How can I hide it
When deep down inside it just tickles me so
That I’ve gotta let go and crow!
Peter Pan (stage version) “I’ve Gotta Crow”
OK, so I know I said I’d be offline for a bit doing the research and whatnot for our yet to be scheduled follow-up to the IEP from hell. But, well, I gotta crow! Besides, I am waiting for a critical bit of paperwork which school doesn’t have ready yet. Uh-huh, you guessed it; Nik’s IEP isn’t even in it’s final form yet and we are ELEVEN DAYS past the meeting date. Wonder what they would have done if Nik hadn’t been ill all last week…
So anyway, back to the crowing bit.
Today, Nik is completely fever-free; he still has the runny nose and slight cough but he’s better. Sooooo…I took him to OT, followed by PT, then playgroup this morning. It was an experiment to see if he could tolerate the full two hour window of work and play.
Nik did awesome.
He gave Miss D (the OT) a run for the money with some things but it was evident to both of us (D and me) that Nik was so happy to be there with her. He did pull his own little “gaslight” on Miss D when she made him ride a scooter around the room. He fought and screamed and kicked and thrashed. Miss D never gave in. When they made it to their destination —the ball pit —and Nik got off the scooter, he gave Miss D a smarmy little look that said “Ha, this is what I wanted all along.” He laughed and toddled off smirking. What a stinker.
In spite of his protests during the scooter ride, Nik actually used a lot of vocalizations and inflections (where’s the speech therapist when you want her, right?). He also did a lot of really great, focused work doing tasks to completion multiple times where he used to simply throw things midway through and go in search of a door to play with. He even let Miss D swing with him for a good long time.
He also did a great job with Miss T during his PT session. Lots of hard work because we are trying to help correct a muscular imbalance in his hips which has developed over time. Nik doesn’t like to bear as much weight through his right hip as he does the left; it’s simply a matter of uneven use and posture but it’s become a habit we need to break. He fought it but made it through and did some nice things in the process. Nik’s gotten pretty good at communicating when he’s either bored or overwhelmed and needs a change of activity. When he’s bored, he throws the things he’s playing with (blocks, puzzle pieces, etc.); when he’s overwhelmed he throws things, too, but it is accompanied by a fit of uncontrollable giggles. Hey, I suppose ti could be worse, right?
So the real crowing is about to start…playgroup. Nik was so present and focused. He played nicely —appropriately and calmly —with a variety of non-electronic toys. Sure, Nik still obsessed about each door and tried to get to them whenever he could and he stuck to lots of things he already knew how to do well. But he tried several new activities and seemed to enjoy them.
He crawled under a low obstacle course Miss T had set up; Nik is not overly fond of crawling or being on his belly and this activity required both. He did this same activity three or four times; each time he did it better and more smoothly.
He played with a baby doll, giving hugs and kisses on the forehead!
He interacted socially with people as if it were a natural every day occurrence for him.
He wanted what two of the other kids had and came over to them to check it out!
I know that many of you understand how some of these things have rocked my world today —in the best possible way!
I think I said this to someone in an email last night —
I am convinced that having Nik away from the sensory overload of the school environment for more than a week has made a tremendous difference in his ability to self-regulate. This, in turn, helps him make such wonderful strides as he did today.
I am so proud of my son —today and everyday; he makes me crow with glee!
I am so happy for both of you! I don’t doubt for a second that this decision you’ve made is the right one! You certainly deserve to celebrate.
Yes, you do deserve to celebrate! And no doubt you are right on the money about what Nik needs and what wasn’t working. Hang in there…And don’t let the school push you around.
If it makes you feel any better, my IEP meeting was in April or May (don’t remember). But I didn’t have the finished IEP in hand until the last week in August. Clerical overload–too many kids, not enough people to type up the documents. ugh.
Kristen, your IEP comment raises the question:
If IDEA regs require that the IEP be accessible to all of the student’s teachers, service providers, etc. as soon as it is finalized and *before* they begin working with the student, then what guarantee do parents have that their child is actually receiving the appropriate services?
I’m trying to find an answer re: whether there is a time requirement for this. BTW, do you know that if the IEP is incomplete, it can be construed (legally) as not providing FAPE?
Guess who’s IEP didn’t include the OT and SLP sections…and I *know* the SLP section is incomplete b/c they still haven’t hired someone AND they’ve denied compensatory speech services in the meantime! ARGH!
Yeah, all my research is making my head hurt. Making me cranky too, I think!
More crowing here! Especially about him taking others’ toys—-a lot of awareness in this boy.
crow away
SMILES for you guys!
I’m thrilled for both of you! Hooray for good days!
In my state, the IEP typically has 10 school days to write the IEP after the meeting. Then the family has 14 calendar days to sign or disagree formally with the IEP. The 10 days to write is a guideline, the 14 for the family is a law, i believe.
The IEP must be written with 14 days allowed for family approval BEFORE its expiration date.
Check with wrightslaw.com
or pacer.org for more detailed info.
If he has an identified need, then they are required to provide the service, or pay for another provider to do it.
I don’t know for sure, but I’m guessing the IEP guidelines vary by state. I know our state has begun using a computer-fill-in-the-blanks program to facilitate getting the documents out in a timely fashion. I know the federal gov’t. and the states mandate certain things, but leave others to the discretion of the individual districts. I don’t know how or where IEP documents fall into this format.
Technically, we had our document in hand prior to the school year, so we had it before service was provided. I’m not sure how that would have played out if we had taken services over the summer.
Thanks for the pacer website, Anon. I’ve been checking wrightslaw and cannot find anything in IDEA 2004 regs about time frames for IEP completion except the statement I made above..I am checking out state regs and have a call into the community legal aid folks here.
Kristen, I didn’t think about the fact that your IEP mtg was held far enough in advance of the school year. Ours was held AFTER the start of this school year. Ugh.
So happy to hear such amazing leaps and bounds for Nik! (Mama always knows best!!!)
Lots of things to crow about! I really truly believe you guys are on the right track pulling him from school.
Their lack of appropriate services almost do him more “harm” than good. You have a network locally and online to help you figure things out.
YOU CAN DO IT!!!
Kristen,
Yes, it may be different state to state. In my state, the IEP deadline is the deadline, no matter when in the year the IEP is due. We have been told that if an IEP is due in the summer, we should write it before the end of the school year (as the staff is working). It doesn’t matter if its summer or not. The deadline is the deadline. Service start dates can be different (ex summer iep, but services start when school does), but it is a HUGE NO NO to let an IEP expire, and in our state the parents have 14 calendar days no matter what.